My Son's Feet

Warning! If you are one of those people who is easily grossed out by other people's feet, don't read this! All you who know me will probably laugh pretty hard at this. The son in question, incidentally, is J.

My son has sweaty feet,
even as I had sweaty feet,
tough, dirty, thickly calloused feet, and slightly cracked
around the heels,
dark from
kicking through dust, stepping gingerly
over sun-hot concrete
(stopping sometimes to pick out burs or broken glass bits),
and then running happy in the muddy grass,
or climbing rocks my toes could grip
while others fumbled in their boots.
—And then my shoes!
My shoes!
Those childhood shoes, flimsy and stretched,
black, grimy inside, and smelling the way
I’m sure my feet would smell,
if I never washed them.
No wonder I tried not to wear them, and left them behind
so often that
my mother stopped buying me anything but flip-flops—
they made my feet sweat, and
(more importantly) confined them—
My bare, clever-toed, sweaty feet,
with the dirt of three continents ingrained in them.
Even now I cherish
my callused soles, refuse the
loofahs and files and polishing stones and lotions,
preferring their roughness and happy memories.

And now my son has sweaty feet.
Little, square, soft but strong feet,
with always dirty toenails,
that his socks stick to like Velcro.
“Now, push with your foot,” I tell him, as I try to wrestle them on
one half-inch at a time.
“Mommy, I don’t want to wear them,” he tells me, and I smile.
“I understand,” I say. “Why don’t you wear your sandals
today? Or go barefoot.”
“I want to go barefoot.”
“That’s good.” That’s good, my son.
Go enjoy the sun-warmed pavement, sharp grass and
soft dirt between your toes. Step on rocks and glass and burs, wince
and then run on. Feel
God’s earth beneath you, touch it, be connected
with it, grip it with your toes and
dance on it, enjoy its dirt and
life
before civility houses your feet with
shoes that are required, and
cut you off.

And then he runs outside,
and I too, following him over
hot rocks and prickly weeds with
tough and blackened joyful feet.